I made a shocking discovery this morning. Not only do I need to skip my morning cigarette, we are out of teabags too!!! This cannot be right. Tea is the nectar of life. The entire British empire was founded on the stuff. What am I to do? How do I cope?

To truly understand my dilemma, you need to understand the bigger picture here.I have always been a big tea drinker. I can get through 20-30 mugs of the stuff in a day. None of that mamby pamby cup and saucer lark. Proper mugs. And I am well organised. I don’t run out of stuff. When I go through the ritual of pouring a cuppa, and refill the sugar or tea jar from the cupboard, I mentally check that we are not running out. This just doesn’t happen to me.

Strangely though, I can handle it. I’ve given up smoking, drinking fruit juice and fizzy pop until Tesco’s opens is manageable. Just about.

But, and this is a big but. Know this. Whoever emptied the last teabags into jar without mentioning the dwindling tea bag stock….I will find you…..and I will kill you.

Ok, maybe not kill kill, but we will be having words.